The Impossibility Of Sensibility, Chapter 8

"Jill? You awake?" I open my eyes to see Emmett staring at me.

"What time is it?"

"A little after 8."

"What are you doing here? I haven't called you yet."

"Sasha called me. She told me that you need to talk to me." Damn her. I roll over so my back is to Emmett. He jumps over me and lands in front of me on the bed.

"I don't want to talk right now. Go away."

"Jilly, come on, please?" Childishly I yank the blanket over my head, ignoring him. I hear him laugh and tug lightly at the blanket. "Jill, come on. I want to know why you're upset."

"I never said I was upset."

"Sasha said you cried last night. That sounds like upset to me, love." Damn her again.

"I don't care anymore."

"Is it because of this weekend?"

"No."

"I don't believe you."

"What did Sasha say to you?" Knowing her, it could have been anything.

"Well, let's just say she wasn't very polite. She told me that if I were any kind of fiance that I'd stay home with you. But you told me that it's okay to go. So I'm confused." I huff out a sigh and pull the blanket down, looking up at him.

"I'm not upset. I don't care. Go hiking. I'll see you Sunday." I get out of bed and make my way down to the kitchen. Now that I'm up I'm hungry and may as well eat. I know this behaviour is childish and I'm acting like a fool, but I don't care. I was going to give him something really special, and he won't even be around to get it now.

"Jill, wait!" Emmett catches up to me easily and follows me to the kitchen. "Jill, talk to me, please? I don't have to go this weekend. I can save it for next weekend or something. Come on, look at me at least?" I pause just before pouring milk into my cereal.

"It doesn't matter when you go, Emmett. It's the fact that I had planned something for us and you ruined it by making other plans without even asking me if we were going to do something."

"What did you have planned?" I sit down and take a bite of my cereal.

"It doesn't matter now. I don't even want to anymore. So just go hiking and I'll see you Sunday."

"I can't stay today?" I look down at my bowl.

"Not today, okay?"

"Okay. I'll call you when I get back."

"Okay." Emmett kisses my cheek.

"I love you, Jilly."

"You too, Emmett." I stare at my bowl as he walks out of the kitchen. I feel terrible, but I don't feel like being around him. I feel like wallowing in my self pity today. I wonder what to do today and decide to go to my old play house. I haven't gone there in almost a year. I pack a lunch, fully intending to stay the whole day, and take off for the forest behind the house. When I get there I stop to admire it first. The tree has grown in the last year and the leaves make a thick wall around the house.

I have to duck while in the house or else I'd probably be able to stand right through the roof. I shake out the bedroom blanket and lay on it, sighing to myself. Pity party for one? I wipe a few stray tears away and bury my head in the pillow. I take a book out of my bag and flip to the page I left off at. I've read only one chapter before I fall asleep.

*

"Why hasn't he called yet?"

"Relax. He's probably just washing up before he comes to see you."

"But he said he'd call when he got back."

"Then maybe he's gotten back late." I go to pick up the receiver when my mother stops me.

"You've called three times already. Surely if someone were there they would have picked up." I sigh and rest my chin on my hand. It's almost 10 PM and Emmett still hasn't called. I'm about to go get a drink when the phone's ring makes me jump. I yank it off.

"Hello? Emmett?" There's a pause.

"May I speak with Mr or Mrs Marion please?" I hand the receiver over to my mother and head to the kitchen for a drink. When I come back she's looking at me and I'm surprised to see that she looks sad. I set my glass on a table and go over to her, trying to listen in on the conversation.

"Yes, I understand. Thank you. Goodbye." She hangs up and shakes her head.

"What? What's happened?"

"You may want to sit down, darling." No! I don't want to sit down. Why are you looking at me that way?

"What's going on?" She rests her hands on my shoulder.

"Darling, there's a reason that Emmett hasn't called yet." My heart and stomach feel as though someone's dunked them into acid.

"What's going on?" She sighs deeply.

"While he was hiking today.. he had an accident. They can't find his body." My knees give out and I sink to the floor. No. No No no no no! Not my Emmett! NO! "They're going to do an investigation, but darling, there was a lot of blood. They're pretty certain that he didn't make it. They think a bear dragged him off."

"Stop it! Stop it right now!" I get up and run out of the house, not caring where I'm going. This can not be happening. He said he would call! He said it! I run until I trip over something, and when I'm down, I stay down. I have no need or want to get up. I have nothing left to get up for. My Emmett is gone. And he's taken me with him.

I lay for what felt like hours, but could have only been minutes, until I hear my name being called. I hear footsteps walk toward me and stop a few feet from me. "Jill." Arms scoop me up and carry me back from the way I'd come. I don't know who it is, and I don't care. All I know is that it's not Emmett. He'll never hold me again.

I drift off as I'm being carried back to my house. The light wakes me up and I open my eyes. My mother and father are both sitting in the sun room, so I assume Greg is carrying me. "I've got her. I'll get her upstairs." I doze off again and I'm asleep before I hit my bed.