SEHE; Chapter 19

Monday January 19 [36w 0d]

"Just a few more seconds Bell, you're doing great." I breathe through another contraction, wishing I had someone here with me. Phoebe left just an hour ago after I assured her that I'm fine, I'm not in labour, and to get out. Well surprise, once the contractions started getting serious, did they ever mean business.

After the current one is done I let my breath out and ease my grip on the bed sheet. They're coming every 6 minutes or so. Not close enough for active labour but close enough that I barely have time to recover before the next one. "You've called my mum? She's on her way?" My nurse today, Jennifer, is very calm and soothing.

"Yes, love. When I called she said no more than twenty minutes. Should be any minute now, my dear." As if on cue, my mother rolls into the room with Phoebe in tow. Jennifer moves aside to let my support system do their jobs.

"Annabel, you told me you were fine." I grin up at Phoebe, who has a mock glare on her face.

"I thought I was. It's happening really fast." Mum sits at the end of the bed while Phoebe takes the labour ball in the centre of the room. Dr Anne walks in and smiles.

"We've got ourselves a full house. I'm just going to check to see how dilated you are, all right Bell?" I nod and grit my teeth. It isn't pleasant but she's done quickly. "100% effaced and I'd say about 5cm dilated. You're making great progress-" I tune her out as another contraction hits, gripping the sheets, leaning over the hospital bed. Jennifer digs her fingers into my lower back which helps immensely. I ride it out, trying my best to breathe. "Have you thought anymore to an epidural, Bell?" I shake my head and stand, my back hurting from hunching over.

"No, I want to do this naturally." Dr Anne has an amused look on her face but doesn't argue.

"Okay, I'll be back soon to check your progress." She leaves and Jennifer walks out after her. My mum smiles at me.

"No one's going to think less of you, hon. Epidurals are wonderful things." I walk around a little.

"I don't care what people think of me, mum. I want to do this for me. No one else matters here."

"What do you need us to do?"

"Ice chips." My mum smiles again before grabbing my empty cup and leaving my little labour room. I turn toward Phoebe. "She's going to drive me insane. I don't even have anyone to blame because Keelan isn't here."

"She just hates to see you in pain, Bell." I sigh and run my hands through my hair. I'd meant to braid it but it's hard to do that when I have to stop every few minutes. Without prompting, Phoebe brushes my hair back and french braids it neatly, managing to get the elastic on as another contraction starts. I turn and grab her shoulders, resting my head on her chest. She mimics Jennifer's motions on my back and this one passes rather quickly.

"Gods I hope this is over with soon. I am not a fan whatsoever." Phoebe helps me down onto the labour ball and I bounce around a little. It helps the pressure in my hips and pelvis and I sigh happily.

"I don't know why, Bell. It looks like a lot of fun." I glare up at Phoebe but am too tired to manage a retort. I manage through three more contractions before my mother makes it back with the ice chips.

"You'll never guess who I saw in the lobby. Do you remember Mrs Tolloway from down the street? Her husband is here getting a knee replacement." I grab the cup and swallow down a snarky comment. Phoebe's massaging on my shoulders helps to relax and keep me focused. Jennifer has been in and out, seeing how I'm doing. She says the contractions are getting closer together, fabulous, and stronger, wonderful, and doesn't think it'll be too much longer now. Two contractions later and Dr Anne is back.

"90% dilated, Bell, fantastic. This is very good. I'm going to move you to the birthing room, all right? It's baby time." I contemplate throwing an ice chip at her for being so chipper but decide against it. How she expects me to walk is beyond me, but I'm pleasantly surprised to find it's only through one door. I can manage that. Once I'm situated in the room Jennifer talks to me, mostly to my mother, about who the extra nurses are and why they're here.

Since baby is premature there are three extra nurses waiting for me to deliver. They will take her to the part of the hospital that the premature babies go to. Once she is assessed I will be allowed to see her. I've told my mum that she isn't to let the baby out of her sight for any reason.

I listen distractedly to the nurses and their conversations. One just got back from a trip to Japan yesterday, where she and her husband eloped. One is returning from maternity leave and misses her baby. The last one is planning to propose to his girlfriend for Valentine's Day next month. It helps keep my mind off the pain and pressure between my legs. "How are you doing, Bell?" I can't tell who asked so I just answer into the room.

"Lots of pressure. The strangest sensation in my arse." I hear a couple chuckles.

"I'd say it's time to push, Bell. Want to hop up on the bed?" I shake my head. I'd tried labouring while laying at the beginning and it was excruciating. It feels much more natural to do it from a squatting position.

"Nope, you'll have to catch this one, doc." I hear some movement behind me and feel my gown being moved. Birthing a human is no time for modesty, I've come to find out.

"Just checking you, Bell. 10cm, wonderful. It's time to push with the next contraction. Push exactly like you're having a bowel movement." I'm suddenly terrified that I'll crap all over her, but I think my intestinal tract has stopped working. In fact, I think all of my organs have stopped and I seem to be having trouble breathing.

"Breathe, Bell. You're doing great. When this next one comes, just push, hon. Just push, let gravity help." The imagery helps me focus and with the next contraction I grip whoever's hand is within reach and push down to my toes. Six contractions later and she's here. She's bellowing. She's tiny and she chisels a spot in my soul for herself.

My mum follows the nurses out of my room and Phoebe clutches my hand. "Good job, mama."